Mentioning the word “Brest” can be hilariously amusing if you’re a 12-year-old, utterly bored, and sitting at the back of a French class when it’s uttered by the only adult in the room. However, Football Daily feels it might be skating on thin ice by dedicating this extensive analysis to a withering critique of Tuesday night’s toe-curling gathering of the CBS Archbishops of Bigger Cup B@nterbury. Instead, we’ve chosen to direct our sharp gaze towards another significant story of the evening. Specifically, the bizarre collapse of a Manchester City side who were leading 3-0 and seemingly cruising in a match that was meant to be a much-needed confidence booster at home against Feyenoord, ahead of a potentially season-defining trip to Anfield this weekend.
Despite their recent poor form largely going unnoticed, we can exclusively disclose that before the match, City had lost five consecutive games across three different competitions. In need of a morale boost after defeats by Spurs (twice), Brighton, Sporting, and Bournemouth, Pep Guardiola’s struggling squad quickly put their recent woes behind them by scoring three goals without reply against the fourth-best team in the Netherlands. Indeed, the match seemed so one-sided that Erling Haaland’s second goal and City’s third prompted TNT Sport’s commentator to confidently declare, “And Feyenoord are well and truly beaten now,” at the 53-minute mark. Except, there was one small detail – they were not.
“It will be a tough season for us, and we have to accept it,” Guardiola remarked, visibly shaken after his side conceded three relatively easy but well-taken goals in the final 20 minutes. “We’ve lost a lot of games lately; we are fragile, and of course, we needed a victory. Three episodes, they didn’t allow us what we needed to win for many reasons, not just in terms of qualification or points to progress. Other reasons. It is what it is, difficult to swallow right now.” As he faced the press following his side’s latest setback, Guardiola was asked about a cut on his nose and visible scratch marks. Explaining the former as a self-inflicted accident caused by a rogue fingernail during his touchline anguish, the City boss dismissed his injuries as “self-harm” before exiting stage left. And then, he apologized.
Next up? As mentioned earlier, City travel to Merseyside on Sunday, and if that game follows form, Guardiola might end up in more pain by the time of the post-match debrief. But for now, as he and his players tend to their physical and metaphorical wounds, Football Daily is off to inform Thierry, Jamie, Micah, and Kate about what happens when you type 5318008 into a calculator and look at it upside down.
Join Michael Butler from 8pm GMT for live Bigger Cup minute-by-minute updates from Liverpool 2-1 Real Madrid, while John Brewin will be on deck at the same time for Aston Villa 1-2 Juventus. “I could probably put the under-18 team out there, and they wouldn’t concede six goals, so I’m very disappointed, angry, frustrated, and the next 24-48 hours are not going to be very nice for the players” – another night to forget for Wayne Rooney as Plymouth Argyle were thrashed 6-1 by Norwich City at Carrow Road. That’s now two points out of 27 away in the Championship this season, with three goals scored and 23 conceded.
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